Think i'd find this a little off putting

bitofatwat wrote:

i think it's brilliant.don't think i'd want to kiss it though.

erixter wrote:

bitofatwat wrote:

i think it's brilliant.don't think i'd want to kiss it though.

nor me

That is fucking dreadful.

What am I looking at? All I see is a big arse...

And I'm spent

Nobby Cheese wrote:That is fucking dreadful.

Would be a nightmare if this was playing while your getting stuck into her hind quarters

bitofatwat wrote:

Nobby Cheese wrote:That is fucking dreadful.

Would be a nightmare if this was playing while your getting stuck into her hind quarters

Who watches Jaws while they're on the job? Don't get me wrong, I go off every time that head pops out but...

Looking back over this thread, I'd do the Jaws theme myself and when the sting appears after a bit, that's when my sting appears...

Duh duh DUHHHHHHuhhhhhh

Off to clean up now, you were great...

What a great word "follamiga" is. Sounds almost lyrical but its English equivalent is "fuck buddy" (and tbh, "fuckfriend" sounds far better than someone who you should be sharing a desk with)

Talking of off-putting...

I saw some fucking programme early hours after falling asleep in front of the box and waking up at some unearthly hour a while back called "Sex Hospital" or some such fucking shit. You were introduced to three couples, two of which had what I'd consider valid issues (one couple the bloke had cheated on his wife historically and she veered between tolerance and telling him to fuck off, cunt; she was looking for licence to do the latter IMO but they went into couples therapy: the second couple, the woman couldn't achieve orgasm through sex; they explores that in a superficial yet suitable way).

The third couple was the money couple. He had a greater sex drive than her and she and he weren't making time for each other. He looked like a fucking elf in a Lord of the Rings type film and was a porn adherent as a result. of his wife not fancying a bit.

They asked him how often he watched porn, he said daily, when asked what sort he went, without preamble, "lesbian strap-on". Somehow I don't think he was getting that anyway...

Anyway, they go before the sex therapist, a tidy but botox-faced woman who looked, sounded and had a name that suggested she was Italian. The Elf obvious expects to get both barrels and she says "1. No more porn".

Turns to the wife. Now you'd expect a bit of empathy, what with her fat elf husband and his lesbian strap-on wanking. So she says "To resolve this, have you tried anal?"

Excuse me? The Elf lights up like it's Christmas, the wife says "yes but it hurt" and the therapist said "Well try it again" and sends her to help along what I can only call "wideners". She gave them two so I'm guessing the elf got to play too.

Then they got to view scenes and see which aroused both of them and they could use them in the bedroom as role play bits. The ones they agreed on according to sensor equipment were "fantasy scenarios", mermaids, wizards and so forth. So they were told to give them a go too.

All I could thing was after the cameras went, The Elf would have just turned around to the wife and said "You know what, love, that therapist is a fucking genius. Now bend over, I'm just putting on my wizard hat..." Poor fucking woman, husband rammed with women fucking each other with strap-ons and she gets to take it up the arse while wearing a unicorn costume. The bloke meanwhile could have only got a better result by the Italian lass giving him a fucking ice cream allowance and letting him eat it while he watched her fuck his wife with a strap on and then he comes over dressed like Zeus and shunts them both up the shitter.

I have to question the show's validity...

   

Nobby Cheese wrote: