Ha ha ha ha ha!!

A THAI hipster has opened a cafe in Bangkok selling authentic British ‘street food’, it has emerged.

Former website designer Dang Ubonchinda is introducing Thai foodies to dishes including chips in a tray with kebab meat, chips in a pitta bread and saveloys floating in some sort of fluid.

Ubonchinda said: “Most people don’t realise Britain’s got this amazing, vibrant street food culture full of bold, gutsy dishes like chicken and mushroom pie.

“I make sure everything is cooked exactly as it would be in Britain. We don’t just fry our chips and serve them, we keep them in a heated cabinet for at least four hours to make sure they’re good and dry.

“My customers love anything ‘authentic’, so I source all our chicken burgers from the same freezer warehouse in Crewe.

“And when you order a pickled egg you can rest assured that none of our staff has a clue what the sell-by date is.”

Customer Anong Mueang said: “Sometimes they get the delivery drivers to make the salad while they’re still wearing their motorcycle gloves, just like in the UK.

“Last weekend I had a ‘British banquet’, which is a portion of chips, a battered cod, gravy, curry sauce, a Big Mac, a fried egg bap, spring rolls, another portion of chips and a really cheap sausage.
Then I felt very unwell.”

If he knew his stuff, he'd have as a signature cheesy chips with red salt

Also missing a trick by not billing "curry and chips" as "fusion cuisine".

"It's where the western potato meets the eastern sauce, and not only that, we have both types - Chinese chippy and Indian base. We pride ourselves on how we have exclusivity with Whitworth's for raisins and sultanas for that authentic British twist" said Thai food critic and partner in the venture Ki Sma Aas

This is of course one of the great sketches of British comedy. I fucking love GGM, still sets me off now (Bhangraman, fucking aces)