had a wasp in the house today,

i hate those things.

luckily it found it's way back out.

horrible things.

you ever been stung by a wasp?

Yes, on the top of my head when I was 16 after opening a wooden crate.

it isn't much fun is it.

No, it isn't.

i remember years ago,
was about 10yrs old.
me and some mates tearing down this steep hill on push bikes,
having a wasp settle on my hand,
and careering headfirst into a ditch.
the bstd.

yes it was quite funny actually.
we probably had a right old laugh about it.

happy days.

Eat wood and sting people. The fucking pointless cunts

NotBert wrote:Eat wood and sting people. The fucking pointless cunts

yup.

Once got stung inside the mouth riding my push bike off road....thought i was going to get that shock thingie where your throat shuts up, wasnt too bad when i stopped panicking. The pain only lasted about an hour

bitofatwat wrote:thought i was going to get that shock thingie where your throat shuts up

Here's a wrinkle for you.

The downstairs khazi is the smallest room in the house by far and away (under 12 sq ft). Every other day for the last couple of weeks when Mrs Bert or I have gone in there, we've invariably found a dead wasp on or around the small window ledge or on the floor at the back under the sill.

Tonight, there was one, alive and doing the breaststroke in the bowl.

No idea how they get in. Best guess would be up the pipe of the small sink but that wouldn't explain the affinity for the window opposite. They aren't in the cistern, the window is constantly closed, neoprene sealed and with no breaks in the fitting. The walls are a mix of tiled and solid block paintwork. The floor is lino. It's a fucking Houdini sketch.

Are they taking on the u-bend and dying at the end of the challenge? And if so, why do they keep sending scouts who aren't coming back? We all saw the Poseidon Adventure, FFS, wasps and people alike.

Another one yesterday and a further one today. Fucking bizarre

NotBert wrote:Another one yesterday and a further one today.  Fucking bizarre

It must be the weather bert. I was walking the dog the other morning and there must have been a nest of wasps/bees near this outbuilding at the back of local Co-op 1000's of the buggers making a right buzzing noise so i thought bugger it i'm going the long way round.  

That's just it, though, BOAT - there's no way in for them.

There were six there tonight - it looked like somehwere between Wasp Jonestown and an insect snuff movie gone wrong.

Found the fucking things. They're getting in under ridge tiles under the front pitch of the house. Somehow they are getting out (I reckon through a gap where the pipes go through the ceiling into the subspace) into the toilet where the pipes are. The pipes are covered but for a gap at the bottom. They only find that when they're exhausted, IMO, and the fuckers have to be small to be there in the first place, so they get to the window, where they die of exhaustion or rest up when I come in and squash them, the squatting cunts.

NotBert wrote: I come in and squash them

 

They're wasps, Tone. Nature's appendix. They might have had a use once but they now exist to eat wood and sting people, the evil fucking cunts. They don't even make jam or pollinate flowers. Twats all.