World Cup women

SAUDI ARABIA

Super-repressive regime that among other things, doesn't allow women to watch, repression indulged by the UK, this is going to go well...

Government-decreed garb


The escapees

AUSTRALIA

And it's sunny all the time...


The UK's two female Prime Ministers were in fact Aussies

TUNISIA

Men are far taller than the women in Tunisia, it seems


Although they can wear lifts in their shoes, like this Elton John tribute act

NIGERIA

Never ever confuse a damn fine woman with an Afro with a man in a comedy wig

MOROCCO

Two fine young women whose image is only marred by the Man In The Iron Mask in the background


Or listed as (I kid you not) "Crazy woman from Morocco"

SENEGAL

Bloke on the right, not at all creepy. Woman in middle has not been seen since


Horny

EGYPT

As hard to get them as Saudi


Although they have players who can even talk to the press

MEXICO

I challenge any of you to genuinely remember what the woman on the right is wearing or looks like


"We remember when we made the quarters. It was a while back..."

COSTA RICA

Stadia in Costa Rica are very much "open plan"


Unlike Paraguay, who didn't qualify this time around, where enclosures are too constrictive


Frankly, if you look up Costa Rican women, you can see why the men think football is the second sport after "the sex"

Apparently her top tells us she plays baseball and is a lawyer

PANAMA

I am saluting the flag


The Embera of Panama have said "I'll be fucked if I'm going to Russia. You need to wear shirts"

BRAZIL

Oh fuck.  You search for this and even the computer sheds its white ink.  Still, I suppose...

THIS OLD THING?  IT'S JUST A FLAG I THREW ON...


FUCK ME, SHE'S ALL BUT OUT THERE


GO ON GIRL, IF YOU WANT TO GET THEM OUT, YOU DO IT!


PRINCE HARRY CAN'T BELIEVE IT, SHE'S OUT!  SHE'S OUT!


I LIKE TO HAVE IT AWAY.  THE AWAY KIT?  DO YOU GET IT?


I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING?  ARE THEY REAL?  NO, THEY'RE FAKE RAYBANS.
ALL ELSE IS NATURAL, BABY.


ANYONE SEEN BERT?  THIS WILL DRAG HIM FROM NO.4


BERT'S DOWN HERE.  HE SAYS HE'S COMFORTABLE...


SO MANY ADMIRERS OF MY BRAZILIAN... FLAG...


CAN SOMEONE PLEASE PICK BERT UP?  HE'S SPENT

URUGUAY

Small country. Women age badly...





Yeah, but you want a piece of this now

ARGENTINA

Odd fact: Argentina's kit has no shorts



Its tops are surprisingly roomy



You could smuggle cushions inside them



But I repeat - no shorts



Do we mind? No, not at all



Sometimes we even just paint on the shirt



Got to admit, I am enjoying this thread, friction burns notwithstandiing...

COLOMBIA

Remember that the Colombian women's cycling team were given a kit that basically looked as if they were, I believe the correct term is "wanny out"



These aren't cyclists. They make me need to change gear, though



Even the sports reporters are bags of horn



Just to finish you off, Tone, a Spot The Ball competition



And one for me...

PERU

Oh my fucking stars, why are you watching the game?



Seriously?









Deysi Araujo, apparently

FRANCE

You get out of South America and you get Europe's finest...

Bacary Sagna is married.  His wife is stunning



You have something on your lips.  Me...



I would consider these goals too



And here's a random one of Sophie Marceau, simply because she's Sophie Marceau

The Colombian tart sitting on the ball.

Nobby Cheese wrote:The Colombian tart sitting on the ball.

I saw that and I thought of you, Tone. Well, it was the second thing I thought of. The first was what I was going to use to clean up...

PORTUGAL

No-one notices the heart thing in ths shot



"Oh, Tony's watching? This is for him"



More?



Oh yes.

GERMANY

We''re so pretty...



That we'll even play to your fantasies...



And you can even make up your own

Blimey Bert you have been busy I dread to think how many images didn't make the grade

Haven't done England yet, Jonesy, so if you want to see if you make the cut...

(You would, btw - I love special guests, it makes me feel like Alan Partridge.  I already have one or two planned.  Heather Graham is devastated that the USA didn't qualify as she'd have been a Sophie Marceau-like posting).  They are pretty easy finds, tbh and I've had some fun doing it.  The finds for me so far are obviously the Brazilian woman stood next to Prince Harry and the spectacular Peruvian woman with the most perfect breasts on this thread who took the title from the Colombian women in the previous photo and who therefore ended up in an angrily-disputed border virtual threesome with me.

SERBIA

Red Star Belgrade considered sacking their reporter because she was distracting the players on the pitch when doing pitchside work and when she interviewed them, they'd just stand there and stare.





The vice president of FK Rada gets something similar in board meetings. Mind you, she doesn't like brown faces



They do have civilian fans as well...



They have models too