And I thought I was a pervert.

A "dangerous sexual predator" has been jailed for 12 years for a string of "truly appalling" acts.

He admitted 13 sex-related offences and acknowledged his behaviour was "unacceptable".

Garyth Twiselton ejaculated into a woman's cup of tea before she drank it, Stafford Crown Court was told.

The defendant, of Lordwell Road, Burton-upon-Trent, Staffordshire, recorded a video which showed him performing a sex act and then stirring the tea.

But he later told the victim what he had done and told police part of his motivation was to "humiliate" her.

Better than his original defence which was 'better than jizzing in the cup after she'd used it. Where's the sense in that?'

Making the shot while she was drinking it, now that's someone with game. And a fiery bellend

NotBert wrote:Making the shot while she was drinking it, now that's someone with game.  And a fiery bellend

Neil Shipperley fancies a shot at the Cup this year

I tried this the other day. If you're going to do it, to end the debate, you put your cock in first, then the hot water after. People who argue the other way around do so from the burns unit.

On the upside, the nurse dressing my wound has put me into an episode of The Singing Detective. "Plastic pitch at QPR, plastic pitch at QPR, oh, I'm going to co-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-me, never mind, doesn't matter now. Got a tissue?"