so annoyed,so embarrassed,and feeling so stupid.no need for replies.just airing a dilemma.

you may,
or may not.
remember my having mentioned,
an ever so slightly built dog walker,
ash blonde type colour haired,
( not good with hair colour descriptions )
cripled girl.
( i think of her as a cripple,
well,
i say "think of her",
it's just how i see her.
not being nasty,
or poking fun. )
because of the way she walks.

anyway,
and this is genuine;

i need to get back there next week,
to buy some hi-viz work kit.
along the road that said dog walker appears from,
about 100yards along,
is or rather WAS,
a shop,
that sells such clothing.

that's where i plan to go next week.

is the shop still there?
maybe,
hopefully.

i wanted so much to ask her this morning.
but how might she react?
might i frighten her?
having blanked her when she caught me gaze,
sometime last year.
might she ignore me?
and alter her morning walk?
might she think???????????
well what might she think?

so,
i shall spend six quid,
in bus fare.
to go to this shop.
that WAS there,
a couple of years ago.

why do i feel so awkward?
why can't i like myself?
have a little self-confidence?
it really IS so ridiculous.
and actually,
if she was a HE,
i still couldn't ask.

wanker!

sorry,
but i'm just so saddenned by it.

Thoughtful stuff eric ...its just a pitty more cant read your stuff

boat,
when i saw that you'd responded,
i felt quite embarrassed.
talk about bearing one's soul.
but it's what i do.
it's what i am.

more people?
reading my stuff?
what stuff?
ramblings of an old fool.

erixter wrote:boat,
when i saw that you'd responded,
i felt quite embarrassed.
talk about bearing one's soul.
but it's what i do.
it's what i am.

more people?
reading my stuff?
what stuff?
ramblings of an old fool.

They are always very descripitive and thought provoking eric. You can often relate to lots of your ramblings too. Your not always alone mate.

i've often wondered about that.
you see people going about their lives,
seemingly untroubled.
who knows eh?