Cup Final Tickets

0-2 down, a late second after going down to ten men with twenty-five to go. Back to pretty much full strength as well.

Went today as the bookend of one of the most cuntish weeks I've had in a long time where every single fucking cunt in the world has thieved my time from me in one way or another.

Flint Town United were the opposition and were now the parole officers for Lee Healey, given the following.
Hallowe'en last year, he scored a three minute or so hat trick for Cefn against Prestatyn.
He went to Bangor in the window
He went driving into a phone box, post box and grit box in someone else's car without them knowing, pissed, in Newtown coming back from a Bangor game
He was convicted of this in his absence with a warrant issued for him subsequently.
He was released by Bangor in the aftermath (that's how bad it was - Bangor lose Les Davies and their only recognised striker otherwise still gets the sack for his behaviour despite them being utter cunts themselves)
He played a couple of games preseason non-league in England
Flint Town took him on eleven days ago
He failed to last the full 90, accruing a clutch of disciplinary points as his driving licence has too many already.

Good year, that.

Ended up 2-2 today, perfectly good goal disallowed that won it. Chips, as ever, excellent, curry particularly thick. A firther wrinkle was the skipper of FTU was Craig Jones, whose last two appearances against Town were a sending off at Bastion Gardens and losing at the Rock which all but confirmed Cefn's relegation and involved him offering my brother out in the car park.

Healey's sending off involved much ribaldry and waving of car keys. Here's the story

http://www.shropshirestar.com/news/2015/06/11/footballer-convicted-for-taking-an-writing-off-16000-car/

which all but confirmed Cefn's relegation and involved him offering my brother out in the car park

A bit of an aftertime this week but indulge me, it's rare that serendipity treats me so.

It was the Word (i.e. League) Cup midweek (couldn't go, playing Connahs Quay, lost 1-3). However, on Wednesday, I happened to be in a shop while Bala (who played TNS Sunday - missed a 12/1 0-0 when Bala aren't conceding and TNS aren't losing) were at Caernarfon.

Now Caernarfon are practically a top flight side - they were toe to toe with Llandudno all last season for the WPL spot and missed out only at the very death. They went a long way to putting brown into the green and white of TNS in the Welsh Cup on their midden when they made them shit themselves by taking an early 2-0 lead before succumbing 2-3. No pushover.

I was in the shop at half time, 8.30pm or so (backing a stalwart of mine, Charles Camoin in the 8.40, Kempton - have a look how he did, I took 11/1 ) and saw the prices. It was 1-1. Caernarfon were 7s at that point. That was frankly nuts, so I had a little bit of that too. Checking the result at home an hour later - 2-1. Tidy... I think this week has been a bit of an apology for how fucking shitty everything has been in September. Finding winners has been a fucking horrorshow.

I've had to give up betting altogether Bert.....Since August 8th my strike rate has been the lowest it has ever been.....Thanks to cunts that keep getting turned over at 1/3 and shorter only to win their next 3 games on the bridle against better opposition I am now skint.
I was on Arsenal, Man City and Liverpool for massive money each time the cunts lost at home to West Ham and the final straw was Liverpool failing to beat Carlisle in 2 hours of football and then drawing 1-1 at home to Sion.
Totally bankrupt......the only solace is that the cunt Rodgers has been sacked.

I haven't known a month like it for sheer nondescript shit, Tone. I have a fair strike rate for places which generally keeps me ticking over or reduces losses even if I'm not finding winners. Not this month. I don't think I've ever backed so many horses that finished eighth - makes me hanker for the days of seconditis.

September signed off with the last race of the month, hot on the heels of my finding said 11/1 winner and Caernarfon besides, with my backing Honey Badger. It got fucking humped on the line, last stride, short head by a 33/1 outsider, it was 16/1 itself. Turns out that in the forty-five previous qualifying races at Kempton, the horse drawn 13 (as the winner was) hadn't won. And it didn't Wednesday because of a handlers' confusion (two from the same yard, colour change), and the winner actually left stall 8 incorrectly.

Reckon that was worth a short head, somehow. No recourse after the weigh in afterwards, of course, and it wasn't found out until after racing finished, but the amazing thing is that the jockeys are responsible for the stall allocation and can be suspended for going wrong but there is no scope for disqualification even if noted before weigh in.

September in a nutshell.

Couldn't go today, the kids had business and pleasure (in age order) lined up.

6-0. Yes, 6-0. I don't care how poor Rhayader are, you beat what's in front of you and that's a fucking shellacking. 0-2 win at Holywell in the week as well (and I really wanted to go there) means that but for the loss to Llanfair (an unaccountable 90 minutes as they scored 4 but they're fucking shit and no less so on that day) we'd be top of the league with slide rule measuring. Three points behind leaders Denbigh and the fans are doing a sponsored walk from Bastion Gardens next week to the opposition ground, a 13 mile yomp to... Denbigh.

Oh fuck aye. Will have to see if I can get there...

Would have liked to have gone to top of the table Denbigh last week but among other things, I was too ill by far, the usual fucking shite.  November started early this year...

We went 1-0 down, they had a man off, we put three past them and they had another man off.  From sixth to fifth, picking a point up on the top spot as it was all change.  2 points off the top.

Yesterday it was a home game against Buckley Town.  All the top five were playing lower reaches sides with the exception of Cefn on Friday night, who were playing on of the main peloton, Guilsfield.

Well Cefn lost.  Unless the world went apeshit, Cefn would not be top on Saturday night.  So we went, via the bridge through Runcorn.  The absolute fucking cunts that are responsible for the roads in the UK have put together no real contingency at the end of the Runcorn bypass where it joins the M56 and so kick off was a distant dream as we got to drive towards Manchester to horseshoe around and join the gridlocked motorway (on which, three or four miles on, there had been a three car shunt, which is spectacular on a road where walking pace was speeding).  Cosmic.  Even better was as we joined the motorway in the "wrong" direction, there was a fire engine trying to go the other way too which also had to therefore negotiate the gridlock, go three or four miles out of its way and then use the hard shoulder to pass where it had just been.

I point this out because as I joined, an Interserve van on the M56, with ample sight of a fire engine with its blues and siren running on the sliproad, decided not to make any concession to anyone coming on and as such, with me constrained by leaving the fire engine to pass, kept pace with me on the slip road to ensure I ran out of fucking road to merge and basically ran me off the road.  On to the hard shoulder I went, cursing the absolute fucking cunt who clearly drives for a living, and clearly extremely badly.

Anyway, we got to Bastion Road at half an hour in, it was 0-0.  By the time we got to no. 3 Bastion Gardens on foot, two doors from turning into the car park, the roar went up.  1-0, and against the stiffish winter wind coming off the Irish Sea, that's a tidy situation to be in.

Curry and chips a given, curry was thick this week and very necessary after the day so far as well as the cold which is beginning to bit at end of season.  Second half kicked off and within 5 minutes, the lead was doubled, far post header from a corner and the game had turned into attack v defence with the wind.  This could be a cricket score.  So naturally, despite some tidy stuff on the floor and looking permanently dangerous, Buckley (who were down to ten men because ex-Seasider Tosh Holmes saw red for calling the ref a "fucking dickhead") pulled one back and then went close twice to equalising.  Jack Kenny came off the bench and settled it all picking his way on to two through balls from the edge of the box and putting the matter to rest with some tidy footwork and finishing.  4-1 and they were good for better, tbh.  

Of course, with results right, that could put us top...  Cefn had lost, so already fourth.  Holywell... lost - up to third.  Caernarfon... won.  So a point behind them.  Could be second or third depending on Denbigh's result.  Denbigh won, 2-3.  Spent an hour trying to get an expanded table from the week before to make certain the positions because I was confident that the two goal difference on the day was enough to swap places with them.  And when I got the table I needed... Seasiders F28A17, Denbigh F26A16

Second, a point off the top and we've already won at Caernarfon and at Denbigh.  Cefn obviously still there but, well

CHARGE!

That last goal at Denbigh (to say nothing of the six the week before) seem particularly opportune on those terms.  We're looking the part, tbh.  Yes, it's a lower league but the side we're fielding have an average age of around 22, which given Hayesy would add one to the rest on his own, is pretty promising.

On the downside, Jack Lewis (left back) is leaving, emigrating to Australia in a week.  Annoying that having got Chris Davies back, Jack is now going.  As a pair of attacking full backs, they're decent.  Unsure who replaces him as well.

Cup next week at Llanfair, which is in fact in the middle not too far from Oswestry.  Looking to go

(who were down to ten men because ex-Seasider Tosh Holmes saw red for calling the ref a "fucking dickhead")

Forgot to add that as I waited for a lull in play to nip into the freight container for a piss (got to love what is acceptable when your gate averages c.300, wouldn't have it any other way), I got one as the Buckley no. 9 subbed himself.

He went off the side and so had to pass the khazi I was now about to leave before he gets to the changing rooms. I assume the manager had told him to keep walking given he'd made the decision to come off himself, but that of course leaves him open to what Tony "No, Lee Healey, here's how to take a car, pissed" Adams would call "banter" from the fans who not unlike myself would stand on the hard standing opposite the stand in what is Prestatyn's attacking half at the Pontins end ( ).

As I was coming out, he was busy offering to "cut you later" to one of the said fans. Seems he'd said as much to Hayesy as well (which is obviously an indicator of having severely lost the day's striker/centre half dynamic battle). Within twenty yards he was only offering to knock people out so I assume he was either mindful of (i) disciplinary charges (ii) the law who, when there, actually station themselves at that corner, the sign says so or my best guess (iii) he'd remembered he'd left his favourite shiv at home.

Jacko was also subbed with a minute or two to go so that we could all give him a clap before he nicks off to Oz, and was skipper for the day. A good day all in all.

Oh, and the ground is now the Motion Finance Stadium. Or as I pronounce it, "Bastion Gardens".

As I was coming out, he was busy offering to "cut you later" to one of the said fans

There is a certain uniform degree of locura about the average Huws Gray Alliance number 9, Tone...  Even Lee "Puskas" Beattie went fucking bananas the other week.  Not sure he's started since...

NotBert wrote: Lee "Puskas" Beattie

Nominations for the same are out in a fortnight, Tone. Will be a travesty if he isn't in there.

So, Llanfair, Welsh Cup, 2nd round.  In terms of travel for me, the wrong side of Oswestry.  The club were laying on a joint "team and fans" coach on to which we had an invite but by the time we got to Prestatyn, it'd be largely the same time as if we'd gone from home.  Would have been nice, but on the plus side, Hayesy didn't have to revisit last Halloween where he marvelled at the fact that my brother never shuts up...

We got to the town (it's Llanfair Caereinion), it's tiny and looks a bit like Llangollen in that you drive along the river, turn left across it and turn right further up to keep going.  A bit eerie to draw the comparison, tbh.  It has a population of 1800 or so, which means the ground is as impossible as Bala's to fucking find.  Stopped outside a general store, tried down a hill, decided against it when it went up to NSL very quickly, u-turned, drove up a twisty road which turned out to be the B4385 and the ground was about 100 yards up it, meaning the longest journey we've had this season was the one we made with the most time in hand (i.e. any).

Here's where the other world begins.  At the car park gate, we were asked if we were players or dignitaries which, thinking back, I wish I'd asked if we looked like players (combined age of we two - 100 and a few days) or the president of Rwanda or something.  We're not, so we were charged £6.  That isn't the car park fee.  That's the entrance fee.  £3 and we were in and not only that, in and standing pitchside with the car ten yards away.  Every club should do that.  Bear in mind this is a second tier Welsh side so the equivalent of Derby County letting you drive into the fucking stands at Pride Park.  I approve.  The ground has no floodlights, the turf is of good, but not exceptional quality and the stand seats 48.  It is set in a cutaway of a slope, houses on all four sides and a van for the tea bar.  The dressing rooms are portacabins thirty or forty feet up a slope and so like a watchtower over the pitch.  The toilets are next to them so you need to be Chris Bonington to go for a piss.  It is fucking awesome.  The Welsh leagues are full of sides who seem to have thought "that patch of difficult-to-access ground with amazing views is big enough for a football pitch".

Anyway, the game.  Town were very tidy from the off ans were in complete control.  Hayesy finally got one while we were present and the Fish doubled it nicely further on.  Just shy of half time, top scorer Alex Jones got a third and having hit the bar as well, the game could end up a cricket score.  Came out second half, Jordan Davies made it four and then it all became a bit subdued, the game was all but done.  Llanfair got one back, Jack Kenny got a fifth (and the fifth different scorer) off the bench and with five minutes to go, Llanfair scored and scored again.  3-5 but it should have been 0-7.  Some very tidy ground ball today from back through front.  Jacko's off for Oz and he'll be hard to replace but we're in the bag for the 3rd round proper.

Here you go. Llanfair

I thoroughly enjoy your Welsh football stuff Bert......keep it up man.
Great pic too.

Welsh Cup 3rd round draw

I won't spoil it for you, you can pretend it's half twelve on a Monday (it was at 7pm but it was a Monday...)

https://amp.twimg.com/v/1087a0b2-dad2-43f8-b5f0-bfa8d81b865f

Porthmadog away today, which is too much of a hike on the back of last week and as my innards have been playing their own version of "red or black" all week, although in a benign way, it is not going to be conducive for a drive the full length of the A55 and then some. Same probably applies for Guilsfield next week as well, which is essentially last week repeated.

Anyway, we won 5-2, Jack Kenny hat-trick, Alex Jones (who may be league top scorer, which isn't bad for a kid who was playing third tier last season), and Jordan Davies. Eight wins in a row, Gibbo manager of the month and Caernarfon drew 0-0 at Holyhead which doesn't need a slide rule. We are top of the league CHAAAARGE!

Connah's Quay in the cup on weekend of 5/6 December is now on the horizon, a grudge match for my brother as his very recent ex-boss is father to one of the Connah's Quay lads and he'll be there. Makes a change from having a barney with the opposition number 9, I suppose.

4-4 draw AET and a 4-2 win on pens (Huws Gray Cup)

The quarters as they are will take place (this was the first) over a period of six weeks because of cause floodlights are not a prerequisite of the league and so they have to be squeezed into the league season. Brilliant. Down to fourth in the league after today, though, as the sides below made hay with their game in hand.

Twats.

How's Puskas getting on?

He's not getting a game, Tone - he never made the shortlist and little Alex Jones and Jack Kenny are on nine apiece for the season. They aren't easy to dislodge. He seems happy to fight for his place, though, even when not on the bench.

The car got pissy on Friday afternoon at the prospect of a North Wales dash when the weather is turning and as such I couldn't get to the Caersws game.  Another win, 1-0, Chris Davies scoring the goal.  However, he looks somewhat like another footballing face (more so than the image below) which means we may try and get a chant going.



You look like Chris Davies
You run like Chris Davies
You shoot like Chris Davies
But to our surprise
You're Gary Neville in disguise, oh yes you are

Gresford away next week and then GCQ in the Welsh Cup, may yet get to both but November has laid an icy finger on my innards this week, a watching brief at the minute.  Regarding the league, back up to third with that crucial game in hand yet but GD was cruel this week as Caernarfon picked up a +4, as did Cefn.  The top three are now the expected top 3 as Denbigh, after doing GCQ 1-0 in the League Cup semi, scored 1 again on Saturday but shipped six in reply against Flint.  Lee Healey failed to notch, which may mean he's gone "Littlest Hobo" again after his red card at Prestatyn, I'll have to check.
(Musical interlude)
I checked. He's now at Mold Alex. He appears to be making his way home to Kirkby along the A55, presumably in someone else's car.

Up to second, winning 1-3 at Gresford; Cefn won but Caernarfon were waterlogged out at Llanfair (see above).

A brace for Puskas who then promptly got scythed down and came off. Jack Kenny into double figures, Paul O'Neill back up and available and GCQ in the cup next week...

Not too bright at the mo so this is somewhat curtailed...